Take Time to Talk Before College Begins

Before your teen leaves for college, take some time to have a talk about your expectations and the importance of making good decisions.

By Amy Reif

The last time I went shopping, I noticed that the stores were already chock full of things that my son and daughter never knew that they needed for a successful college career. From color- coordinated bedding sets to organizers to study aids, heading off to college for the first time presents an exciting array of possibilities and new experiences for teens.

What the stores don’t tell you is that your teen needs your influence, particularly during the first six weeks of college, a pivotal adjustment period. Before your teen leaves for college, take some time to have a talk about your expectations and the importance of making good decisions. And not just decisions about classes and career planning.

Remember, that for many teens, this will be the first time that they are away from home for an extended period of time. They will have lots of unstructured time to fill and freedom to explore in both positive and negative ways. They will most likely have a roommate, and it may be someone who is very different than your teen and who has a different set of values.

Talk to your teens about how they will spend their free time, and how they will handle the almost inevitable situations that will arise involving alcohol. Not every college student drinks. But be aware that college students, who do drink, often drink not to be social but to get drunk. Talk with your teens about how binge drinking places them at risk for alcohol poisoning, fights, car crashes, unwanted sexual activity, rape, academic failure, and, unfortunately, even an untimely death. Let them know your hopes and expectations for their future and, most of all, your love.

One excellent way to start or continue the conversation is for you and your rising freshman to attend The Perils of the College Drinking Culture on Wednesday, July 31 at 7 p.m. at Northern Virginia Community College’s Ernst Community Cultural Center located at 8333 Little River Turnpike in Annandale.

The nationally recognized Perils program sponsored by the Unified Prevention Coalition of Fairfax County, in collaboration with the Fairfax County Police Department, includes Haze, an award-winning film about the dangers of alcohol and binge drinking on college campuses. A panel will then discuss the problem and consequences of binge drinking from the perspective of a student, ER doctor, police officer, county prosecutor, college administrator and a parent whose son died after catching a ride from a drunk classmate.

Your teen may be beginning a new stage in his or her life, but research confirms that you as a parent remain the chief influence. 

Amy Reif is the health sector coordinator of the Unified Prevention Coalition of Fairfax County.

The Unified Prevention Coalition of Fairfax County is a nonprofit organization with more than 50 community partners working together to keep youth and young adults safe and drug-free. Visit www.unifiedpreventioncoalition.org.