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Community Corner

Battle of the Smithsonian

My day with my daughter and millions of our closest friends

Last Friday night, my daughter and I headed to my friend, Amanda’s, in Washington, D.C., for a sleepover and weekend of fun. This was a deliberate act to create a bond between them, as Amanda and her husband are the people with whom we will be traveling to and throughout Indonesia in a few months. 

The weekend of Operation: Bonding began promisingly, as almost immediately my daughter discovered Amanda has a large, functional gong in her house and Amanda had bought her a red velvet cupcake, my daughter’s favorite. Those two things together had my daughter requesting a follow-up visit of “nine nights and 10 days” at Amanda’s house.

Kids are weird.

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Had we known this was all that was required, we may have avoided implementing part two of the plan: a visit to the Museum of Natural History on Saturday — an idea we shared with approximately 4.7 million other people. I’m not sure if it was the horrible, rainy weather that drove people indoors, or if it was because it was the first day of spring break for many kids. All I know is if I wanted to be that close to so many people, I might actively attempt to be a nice person. (Shudder.)

Crush of humanity aside, it was definitely a learning experience — and not only in the traditional sense. In the few hours we spent there this weekend, we learned the following:

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  • When you are at the Natural History Museum with a 5-year-old, you get the dilettante tour of museum exhibits (an octopus! a termite! human skeletons! butterflies!)
  • A “free” afternoon at a museum can cost almost $50 when you figure in parking, a snack at the museum café and tickets to the butterfly exhibit. (Envision me standing with pocket linings pulled out while looking pathetic).
  • When presented with food options at the museum café, your child may opt for a Rice Krispies treat as large as her head. (Related: Dr. Niloo is a wonderful pediatric dentist in Oakton.)
  • Disgusting as it is, the South Asian Atlas beetle is not nearly as gross as a strange man walking by and burping loudly in your face. (Oh yeah, it happened.)
  • The temperature of the butterfly exhibit is not unlike the temperature at Bikram yoga (and requires almost as many contortions to work your way through on a busy Saturday).
  • After a head-sized Rice Krispies treat and a day at a mobbed museum, your young child may not respond to reason when you try and get her to leave the butterfly exhibit before she has the opportunity to experience a butterfly landing on her.  (And by “may not respond to reason,” I mean “will hide behind the nearest door and refuse to come out.”)

We finally did get her to leave, and it was such a relief to get back to Amanda's house ... and the peacefulness of the incessant gonging.

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